My daughter came in the house upset today because the two puppies were fighting with each other.  Not play fighting, but real fighting.  She could not break the fight up.  I told her to throw a pitcher of water on them.  Sure enough, that stopped the fight.  My daughter took her favorite puppy in the laundry room to survey the damage. 

She was upset about the whole incident and nothing I said seemed to help her.  She is a daddy’s girl and they share a bond when it comes to the dogs; so I had her give him a call. He was able to calm her down and explained that they had to establish a pecking order so to speak.  She still blames the puppy who is not her favorite for the whole thing.  “That puppy needs to go”, she says.

Later this afternoon, my children were rehearsing in the living room for a show they were putting together complete with costumes.  I was asked not to peek because they wanted to surprise me.  I took my laptop to my room to catch up on blog reading, but soon I heard a fight brewing.  I could not make out exactly what they were saying, but the tones of their voices led me to believe they were arguing.

Sure enough, moments later, I heard feet stomping down the hall and the cross words could be made out.  Sissy and Bubba were having “creative differences” over the show.   They disagreed over the choreography and costumes, but it soon reverted to pettiness.  He said she was being too bossy and she said he was not listening to her ideas.

They came into my room and both collapsed on my bed in a huff.  Paddy slowly crept in behind, standing between them just looking at me with his big blue eyes.  He shrugged his shoulders and just stood there while they both pleaded with me to see their side and make the other child behave.  I told them I wanted them to work it out. 

When my children are fighting I try not to jump in and settle things immediately.  I want them to learn how to talk through their differences, how to listen, and how to compromise.  So they sat on my bed and talked it out.  I interjected only twice.  Once to tell Sissy to watch her tone – the words she was saying were fine, but her attitude made them come across very ugly.  They worked it out and went “on with the show”.  I was so proud of them!

Psalm 133:1 (NIV)

 How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!

I thought about disagreements that I have had with my Christian brothers and sisters.  I wonder how many times I have gone to God asking Him to see my side so to speak; asking God to intervene and change their heart or actions.  Please don’t misunderstand me; Prayer is the first place we need to go when there is trouble in God’s family, but do we ask God to bring peace when we ourselves are not doing anything to promote it? Do we ask God to change their hearts without considering that maybe it is our heart that needs the change?

Early in my marriage, I came to my Mom for some advice about a disagreement I was having with my husband.  She told me that she recommended prayer, but to be careful.  “Be careful of what?” I asked. “Well” she said, “don’t be surprised if you go down on your knees asking God to change your husband, but come up from your knees with YOUR heart changed.”  I learned her words are so true. Prayer is powerful.

I think Christians, for the sake of unity, avoid talking to their brothers and sisters about conflict.  They think they are doing the right thing by walking away or keeping their mouth shut.  I believe at times this IS the correct action, however, if you walk away with bitterness and hard feelings in your heart, wouldn’t it be better to talk about it?  Calm down if you must, but approach your sibling in love and work your problem out.  It will take effort, but it is an effort well worth it.

Colossians 3:13-15 (NIV)

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.

Ephesians 4:2-3 (NIV)

Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.

By the way, my grandfather was released from the hospital today. Thank you for your prayers.